Ruka's Reverie
by supamisscoolio
Summary: As Kaname turns Yuuki into his bride, Ruka watches, heartbroken but not alone. Akatsuki also watches from the shadows.
1. Mirror, Mirror

This is just a short, sweet story I wrote one night while I was staying up. RukaxKain is my favorite couple EVERRR!!! I felt it was finally time to add in my two cents to the numerous RukaxKain fanfics. They're all wonderful :)

**Chapter One:**

**Mirror, Mirror**

Hanabusa Aido slammed Ruka's door open, leaving it to smash into the opposite wall. Due to superhuman strength, a large crack split through the wood in protest.

"Ruka! Ruka! It's happened! It's happened!" He cried. His blonde hair ran wild on his head, every which-way it could. His blue eyes ran even wilder until they found Ruka.

"It happened! Kaname-"

Ruka looked toward him and sighed, bothered. "Slow down. I cannot understand you."

"Kaname has bitten Yuuki, and it is revealed that she is a pureblood- and his younger sister." Akatsuki appeared behind Hanabusa. He was noticeably calmer and more collected.

"Wh-well!" The other boy rebuked, indignant. "I was trying to put it a little more gently-!"

"It's fine, Aido," the girl replied solemnly. Her breath softly escaped her as she rose up from her desk.

She hadn't been able to sleep, of course.

"Is he coming back?" She inquired softly.

"Yes! At least, I hope so- I mean everything around here's gone crazy!-" Hanabusa ranted, the rant of a boy who was about to lose his sanity from suspense, curiosity and confusing events. His wild yellow hair only accented this.

Ruka turned her head to the side then looked back to Akatsuki and Hanabusa. Her eyes softened, avoiding there gaze. "Go," she told them softly. "I should put a coat on. It's cold outside."

She didn't need to explain that of course she was going with them, to whatever lay beyond.

Ruka ran out into the hallway, a long violet robe over her lacy nightgown, prepared to go out and brave the night. Her dusk-colored hair rolled unkempt down her back, waving with wild abandon. Her face was pale, but her caramel-colored eyes bright and red-tinged and shining out of the hollows of her face. She pulled the covering tight around her shaking body, mentally preparing for the cold outside.

She inhaled. She murmured to herself: "I can do this. Hold it in-"

Her voice stopped dead in her throat. There were light, catlike footsteps behind her. Footsteps she had grown the recognize instantly. She turned around.

There he was, Kaname Kuran.

"Lord Kaname!" She cried.

He smiled back at her slightly. The air between the two of them froze, heavy with unsaid emotions.

Kaname started speaking, but Ruka's ears shut. He said something about an apology, something, something- her heart lit like a fire and started beating way too fast. She couldn't think straight. Something he could tell, she was sure. She got nervous- she had to go, before she lost it all, right here, right now-

Crying was for later! Don't cry in front of him, god dammit!

"I need to go to the Sun Dormitory, I need to be useful…" she muttered, desperate to get away.

"Ruka-"

"Don't worry," she smiled back weakly over her shoulder. "I was only dancing with myself." She turned to leave at last.

"Perhaps unfairly," he replied behind her. "I trust you."

Ruka's heart dropped for a minute, and a soft flush graced her cheeks as she warmed.

"Thank you."

The rest of the night was a hazy blur; Akatsuki, Hanabusa, and she had stayed by the humans. No danger had really emerged.

But something surprising did happen. The humans begged not to have their memories wiped- they begged to remember that night.

Why some simple mortals would want such a horrid, heavy night weighing on their minds, Ruka didn't know, but she complied. She did nothing to stop them, anyways.

When Ruka got back to her private room, she made sure no one else was within hearing distance. She looked outside- the hallway was empty, the doors were all closed, and their inhabitants were sleeping contentedly. She waited for a disturbance- heard none- and then turned into her room. She took her violet robe off, pulled her unkempt hair out of her face, and sat down at her dresser.

The dresser was actually a vanity table, with a large circular mirror attached to a small wooden desk, which was elegantly carved and shaped, with lion paws for table legs. The top was littered with large, fancy, and variously colored bottles. Some smelled of sweet perfume, others of softly scented lotions, and others were powder or blush or eye shadow (none of which Ruka needed of course, but if she felt creative…). The mirror had light bulbs fastened to its frame, in a way that was elegant and fancy, but clownish now.

Ruka looked into the mirror. In the crude fluorescent light, it showed how nightmarishly dark her undereye area looked, in contrast to her colorless face. There wasn't even a trace of blush.

She studied her bright red eyes which lighted up even brighter as her mirror's light reflected off of the tears gathering by her eyelashes.

_Now you can cry_, her mind assented.

A great sob wracked Ruka's exhausted frame. She gasped sharply, with a high shriek at the top of her sobs. Sorrow controller her then, as she cried and cried and cried. Ruka watched the mirror, fascinated, as the tears ran in pure rivers on her face, over her cheekbones, down her jaw, slipping silently down her neck. She thought about how much of a tragic beauty she made. The red in her eyes made her brown irises seem more vividly colored. Her dust tinted tresses streamed down her body, catching her tears in its soft and supple net. Her pale lips opened in a silent prayer.

_Mirror, mirror, if you could speak, I wonder what you would say. _She thought. _I wonder if you would think me silly, for all the times I've cried over this one boy. _

Hanabusa, Akatsuki, Shiki, Toya, Takuma, not even Kaname knew what she was truly like, she reflected sadly.

They didn't know the romantic part of her, the part that daydreamed and sighed, fantasized and smiled and winked with secret affection.

See, there were three types of love to her: lust, infatuation, and true love. Lust was only shallow desire. Infatuation was a blind illusion imitating love. Infatuation didn't last long. True love was the kind that made your heart jump and fall with the strength of mountains. It was _real-_ it was a genuine love that made you want to be around the other, made you think about them all day long, and your only wish was to be around them all the time, to feel the light of their smile shine on your face. It was pure diamond, true love. It could withstand everything. And even as you receive the invites to the other's wedding to someone else, you still believe in your heart that he is going to turn around and come to you.

Nobody knew about all her secret wishes. All the times she'd prayed on rose petals, on her lucky numbers, at special times like 11:11, silly human superstitions- but she tried nonetheless.

Nobody knew about all her fanciful daydreams. Not even she could count all the times she'd had silent reveries: Kaname would walk in and insist she stop calling him Kaname Sir, only Kaname. She wondered, when she went shopping for perfume or dresses, which he would like best. She would come out in her finest silver dress. 'You look especially lovely tonight,' he would say, with one of his slow smiles. 'That perfume, it's the one. It smells of roses. It reminds me of you.'

Nobody knew that even when he spoke, that she closed her eyes to listen to the sweet honey of his voice.

Nobody knew that when he passed her, she held her breath in nervousness.

Nobody knew that her world had just fallen in around her.

Yuuki. _Yuuki._ Yuuki Cross, Yuuki Cross, _Yuuki Cross!_ She held in a rising scream. Yuuki? Why Yuuki? What did Yuuki Cross have that she didn't? What made Yuuki so much better, in fact, _acceptable,_ and what made her not? It wasn't like Yuuki was unbelievably beautiful- she was cute- but _Ruka_ was also the envy of the girls and the love of the boys! It was Ruka, who had devoted so many things to him, who had always wished on a star, prayed on a rose, held her breath- _none of it mattered to Kaname!_ All the simpering sighs and doe eyes in the world meant nothing to him. He only wanted _Yuuki._

She reflected. Yuuki was small with large, round eyes that dominated her round face. She had rather short chocolate brown hair, and cheeks that were always blushing- at least when Kaname was around. Yuuki, stuttering, light-hearted, and pure. And, oh right, a pureblood.

Ah, there it was. There was the difference. She was a pureblood, something that, no matter how hard she worked, Ruka would never be able to attain.

But Lady Sara was also a pureblood!-

And so Ruka thought. But, she realized, Yuuki was _the one_, the one for Kaname. She was the one that had slipped through his barriers of darkness and light, known the real him. She knew the real Kaname. Something Ruka had never done.

Face it or hide, Ruka was an outsider. She always would be.

How in her silly head had she ever thought she could be with _Kaname?_ Kaname was a pureblood, imposing, regal, and strong. He wasn't cruel, he was good, he was handsome. Everything that Ruka wanted, but nothing she could get-!

She broke away from her reverie and looked into her tear stained reflection.

"Mirror, mirror," she whispered. "Tell me what you see. Could there ever be anything between Kaname and me?"

The mirror remained blank, impassive, and suddenly, a wave of rage, rejection, pain, fear, and loss broke upon her.

She was worth nothing! What was all the beauty, wealth, and status in the world if she couldn't have the one thing she truly wanted?

The diamond that had grown in Ruka's heart for Kaname wilted and disintegrated, turning to dust, flying away in the tidal wave of her emotions. Her heart turned to paper, Ruka decided. Her useless heart, all it was made of was paper- it wanted to run away, it was so easily damaged, and now it was in its last throes. She let out one great cry, and swept all the useless bottles off of her desktop; she threw her chair aside, and gazed into her cursed image in the mirror, until at last, she ripped the mirror off of its hinges and tossed it away. She collapsed on the floor, swallowed up in her misery. She was a victim of her emotions, helplessly trying to stay afloat in the crashing waves of her heart, crashing, crashing, crashing…

It was then she heard a knock on the cracked door.


	2. Mirror, Mirror, Reverse

And now this chapter is fittingly from Kain's point-of-view. WAIT DISCLAIMER: I do not own Vampire Knight, its media, characters, storyline- that belongs to Matsuri Hino and Viz Media. I honestly don't know why everyone puts a disclaimer at the beginning of like, EVERY FRIKKEN chapter. after all, this _is_ a fanfiction website... it wouldn't be fanfiction if it was all our own...

**Chapter Two:**

**Mirror, Mirror, Reverse**

Akatsuki Kain supposed it could have been much worse when Hanabusa and he finally broke the news to Ruka. It was no secret to anyone that Ruka was in love with Kaname. Undoubtedly, finding out that Kaname had sealed his relationship with Yuuki to his wife/princess would leave Ruka heartbroken. But she'd braved it, held in her sorrow, and had fought with the others against Rido.

That was something astounding to Kain.

He alone knew just how much Ruka loved Kaname.

He had watched- unknown to Ruka- as she flipped through silly girl magazines, grinning, circling things, and looking intently at the pages.

That was the only time Ruka smiled, when she was daydreaming about spending time with another.

That should hurt, but it resonated with a numbness. Akatsuki supposed he had just gotten used to it. After years of loving a girl who had eyes only for another, you built up an immunity. Besides, Kaname had a lot that he couldn't possibly offer- fame, nobility, he was a _pureblood_ for goodness' sake! Something that Akatsuki Kain could never be.

In the end, he became content to be Ruka's faithful, unknown protector.

It seemed natural, to his apathetic behavior. Ruka deserved better, but he could at least watch from the sidelines.

It was worth it, to see a rare, true grin full of joy from her. Ruka was born an impetuous, giggling child, but the world- Kaname- had turned her into a solemn adult. After her seemingly useless charms did nothing to help her case, and time went on, Ruka realized that Kaname didn't want her. It changed her. She became still and unhappy.

That's how you could tell how much she loved him.

Something was nagging Kain, something in the back of his head, to go check on her.

And so Akatsuki got up out of bed. He hadn't been able to sleep. He stood up, yawned, put some shoes on, and walked out of the room.

He would just check on her, that's all. Make sure she was sleeping soundly. Besides, it had been a long, terrifying night, and he just wanted to reassure himself that Ruka was okay.

The hallways at night were eerie- there were no sounds, not so much as a buzzing of another creature. White moonlight spread its bright rays through the wide windows, and lit up the opposite walls, leaving the others in dark shade.

Akatsuki strode through Cross Academy, and entered the girls' end of the Night Dorms. If he was found he'd probably get in trouble, but he didn't care.

He was worried about Ruka.

He knew where her room was, down the left, and then to the left again for seven rooms. Then he came to a white door, and knocked softly on it.

He heard a muffled gasp, and the alarm bells rang. He turned the knob and opened the door without another thought.


	3. Glass Heart

okay okay peeps no wonder everyone's been so confused! i accidently put the epilogue in for chapter 3! so sorrrryyyy D:

on the bright side, it's fixed now, and this is my fav chappie :P enjoy

**Chapter Three:**

**Glass Heart**

Ruka looked up, shocked, as Akatsuki Kain burst through her door, with a twisted look on his face, of fear.

She hiccupped. "A-Akatsuki?" She croaked.

Akatsuki looked thunderstruck, as if he'd be shot, right between the eyes.

"…Ruka?"

He eyed the broken, multi-colored bottles on the floor, the shattered mirror in the corner, the red of Ruka's eyes and still-drying moisture on her face.

"What happened-?" He started.

"Nothing," Ruka muttered, too quickly.

She was so see-through, if you knew how to look.

"No, I know better." He replied. "Look at this mess…" He turned to see Ruka trembling on the floor. "What's wrong?" He gently lifted her up by her waist.

For Ruka, the combined humiliation of being discovered in her tantrum and the traumatic events of that night were too much. The slight dam that was built broke, and the river flowed forth again.

Akatsuki didn't say anything, jut gently hoisted her to her feet.

Ruka couldn't really think right then. There were too many feelings. "Go away," she whispered childishly. Her voice was hoarse from sobbing. She pushed herself back from him decisively-

And she slipped on a piece of glass.

Ruka's eyes widened as she felt her sense of balance lurch and her body twist and lean backwards. Her hair flew up, obscuring her vision. She was in limbo for one confused moment.

Then she felt a reassuring hand on her back, pulling her back towards him. She grappled at his chest for balance, and steadied herself.

Her long eyelashes ticked against his bare chest, where his shirt was loosely unbuttoned. There was a slight grunt from Akatsuki as he effortlessly swept her up into his arms and carried her out of the room.

"Let me see your foot," he ordered, setting her down on the floor.

She tried to protest, but honestly, she was exhausted. She only squawked lightly as he lifted up her foot. He slid the glass piece out of her heel quickly, so it didn't even hurt terribly.

Akatsuki straightened up. Ruka's brown eyes followed him. He sighed. "And now I have to clean this mess up," he muttered.

"And how are you going to do that?" She replied, but softer this time.

Akatsuki simply summoned his fire gift, and the glass melted and burned into ashes. However, nothing else lit. It was as if she had only spilled some dust onto her floor.

"I'll sweep that up," she squeaked quickly. She was determined not to be entirely useless.

She ran into the room, grabbed a broom and dustpan, and swept the ashes up off the wood floor and dumped them into the trash, deliberately keeping her eyes off of her visitor.

Then her good manners dropped in. "Uh… do you want a glass of water, or something…?" She asked.

Akatsuki hesitated. Honestly, the past moments had been perhaps the best of his life. Feeling his Ruka finally in his arms, her soft hair brushing against his skin, her rose perfume thick in the air, her body resting against his, if only for a moment- "Yes, water please."

Anything to keep this beautiful reverie going. He didn't want it to end.

"Oh," Ruka called behind herself, "come on in."

He stepped politely in the room, quiet, until she came back with a glass.

"It's nice and cold," she said.

He took a grateful drink of the water. It actually felt really good. Then Ruka shrieked.

He almost dropped the glass. "What! What?"

"Your feet!" Ruka cried, covering her mouth. "You have _glass_ stuck in them!"

He looked down at his bare feet. Oh, right.

"Yeah," he shrugged. "I had to step somewhere to catch you-"

But Ruka was already gone. She came back with a towel. "Let me get those out of your foot."

"Wait a minute-" Akatsuki started-

"No! Sit!" Ruka demanded, with all her childish charms.

He obeyed. Ruka kneeled down and she lifted up his foot. She bit her lip and quickly pulled piece after piece out.

_Owww._ Akatsuki gritted his teeth. Ruka was less than delicate with her nursemaid skills.

At last she got the shards out. "Other foot," she said.

"_What?_" He almost screamed.

"Other foot," Ruka said coolly.

"Okay…" Akatsuki winced. Ow, ow, ow, ow, owwww! He was shocked that he had so many shards in his foot without it breaking in half.

"Done!" Ruka said. She put the shards on the towel, wrapped them up, and threw the pieces in the garbage. The towel she put into a clothes basket.

"Well," she said proudly, putting her hands on her hips. "Aka-aaa…" She yawned loudly, finally realizes how tired she was.

The night was wearing on Akatsuki too. "Good night," he said softly. So his magical night was ending…

"Good night," Ruka smiled sweetly. "And thank you." She slowly closed the small distance between them, and hugged Akatsuki.

His heart plummeted and he was too stunned to respond. By the time he found his nerves again, she was pulling away.

She gazed into his eyes and gave him one more happy smile. Then she turned away, and he turned to go.

"I'll… see you tomorrow," she said softly before she closed her door.

Akatsuki started walking back to his room.

For the first time in too long, he really looked forward to tomorrow.


	4. Diamond Again

_**Epilogue:**_

_**Diamond Again**_

_In the while that followed, Ruka found it hard to get out of bed. She always wanted to stay in her sleep and dreams, where no nightmares could find her. _

_Of course, eventually, she had to get up._

_The deep depression that followed her found a lot of changes in her. Ruka became more- friendly. More open._ After finally realizing the truth of Yuuki and Kaname, she lost some of her frostiness, the pride that a defeated opponent loses in a lost battle.

Later, she could even find it in her battle-torn heart to wish Kaname and Yuuki well. The growing pains that raked at her heart ached every time she saw them, but gradually, a peace began to fall on her.

After a while, she stopped looking for Kaname's dark hair, and started looking for red.

Akatsuki watched Ruka morph back into the happier, less standoffish girl he had missed. And eventually, the doe eyes that focused on Kaname faded into normalcy, and the doe eyes reserved for another turned to him.

And so Ruka's paper heart grew into glass, and gradually, without her knowing, a diamond heart took root and replaced the glass.

She was truly in love.


End file.
